Oh the Shame!

Over the last few weeks I have come across the topic of breastfeeding in the media and in conversations far more often than I have ever before.  Now, this might be because I am a new mom myself and that I am aware of it more but whatever it may be, one thing that seems evident to me is that this seems that this is a public forum to shame families who choose to use formula to feed their children rather than breastfeed.

The shaming is not always blatant and overt.  Sometimes it a comment such as "Oh...you're NOT breastfeeding?" (emphasis on the NOT with an awkward smile and a quick aversion of the eyes).  Or it's a "Ok, so you are going to have to ween your baby off of that formula you were supplementing with as soon as you can.  Breast is best!"

However sometimes it is very blatant, such as the Fraser Health "Infant Feeding Plan" in BC which uses scare tactics on new families (like we're not already nervous enough caring for a new baby) such as "babies who are formula fed may have lower IQ's, could suffer from obesity or diabetes or may have a greater risks of dying from SIDS.  A feeding plan that has now been removed from the Fraser Health website as a result of backlash from upset parents. Duh!

What these shamers are not taking into account is the fact that some parents don't always have the CHOICE to breastfeed.  Same sex parents, adoptive parents, parents who use gestational carriers (aka surrogate mothers), not to mention mothers who do not produce enough breast milk or even in some cases none at all.  Yes there are some women who for personal reasons choose not to breastfeed their children but that is their own choice and they should not be looked down upon and shamed because of their choice.

Formula is produced for a reason and is used as such.  Shouldn't the main focus of feeding infants be that they be healthy and happy?  And if that means that they are breastfed, formula fed or a combination of the two then we should be supportive of the parents not judgemental. If the child is happy, growing and sleeping well, what more could you ask for?  Support these new parents as it is already stressful enough (often with hormones running high) learning to care for a new little person or persons in your life.  These parents don't need your negativity.

So in saying this, I encourage you to be that support to new parents you come across.  They need it!  Not to mention there are plenty of us formula fed babies out there who aren't babies anymore nor are we uneducated, obese, diabetic and guess what????  We're still alive!!!!